Haute Couture by Heather...Tongue in Cheek Tuesday

I have a man.

So clearly, that makes me an expert on how to catch a husband and get married.

This is in no small part due to my style and...the subtle things I do on a daily basis to maintain my level of sophistication.  Men secretly love a woman who has a flair about her.  So, if you are a single woman, looking to get married, please hear my words on style.  Embrace these....words of wisdom, if you will.  And you too will soon find yourself in a loving embrace.

 

First, make sure to only wear the finest clothing.  A ratty sweater is often a good choice to impress a man.  It lets them know what a classy woman you are....and make sure to wear it often.  Obviously he liked it enough to ask you out, so he clearly wants to see it in frequent rotation.  It's important to take your man's feelings and likes into consideration, and dress to make him feel like he's a real winner because he's got you on his arm. 

Make sure to enhance your sweater's looks and make it...extra special by...embellishing it with sophisticated little touches...like bits of thread and fluff from your sewing.  Can I just say The Mister finds extreme pleasure in de-fluffing me on a daily basis.  Oh yes.  Before I am allowed to leave the house and actually be seen in public, he takes several moments to look me over...head to foot and personally remove any debris that is attached to my person.  You want your man to enjoy the time he spends with you.  Make it fun for you both.

As they say, the way to a man's heart is through his stomach...a good way to show him that you are in fact a good cook and will make him tasty victuals on a daily basis...is to wear a symbol of this, like a badge of honor for all to see.  A smudge of flour strategically placed on the bosom will give a man this knowledge...without much effort.  He's already looking there, why not give him some info at the same time...kind of like your own little infomercial.  We interrupt this programming to let you know, this woman can cook!  Remember ladies, knowledge is power.

A man also likes to see his woman with her hair done....just so.  He likes to know you take time to pretty yourself up for him on a daily basis.  Learn the classic technique of...pony tail, and wear it every.  single.  day. 

And finally, make sure you ALWAYS wear makeup.  Some Burt's Bees lip balm will go a long way to upping the sex appeal.

You can thank me later...once the proposals start rolling in...and they will.  And if you're already married and start using these techniques, your husband won't know what hit him when you come strolling by.  Lucky son of a gun.

Please Click Here for more fun during Tongue in cheek Tuesday!

Thanks for reading!

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Semi Homemade Mom 

Heather